Become a Great Parent - Starting Today
So you've identified your parenting style and want to
change it. What can you do?
You've taken the first step by identifying it, but you
have habits and attitudes that feel natural. You
understand that they are not the best parenting
techniques, but they are familiar and feel right to you.
How can you stop being so strict (authoritarian) or too
passive (permissive)?
It might help to write the changes down. Post it
somewhere you will see it often. The refrigerator
perhaps or the bathroom mirror.
What does a good parent look like?
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A good parent shows affection and warmth
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A good parent gives praise
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A good parent sets boundaries with clear
limits and explains what will happen if the limits are
broken
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They are consistent in what they expect
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The expect co-operation without
demanding it
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They do not embarrass children in public
or at home
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They save arguments for private
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They do not blow up in anger
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They do not say "I told you so."
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They never say "That's stupid."
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You can add many more...
Think about the relationship you would
like with your child. You can start that relationship
now.
So create that list of what you want to change. Post it
where you will see it first thing in the morning (and as
often as possible during the day). Some of these things
will seem alien at first. Many parents are uncomfortable
with praise (more than likely they never received it).
So think of something before you see your child tomorrow
morning. Practice saying it.
"I like that shirt. It looks good on you." Then, just
say it. Don't go overboard. Tomorrow you can say
something different. "I'm happy you remembered to take
out the garbage. That really helps me out."
It won't take long before you become the parent you want
to be.
